Chapter II of Dec. 30 Post

Good Morning!

This last day of 2010 I woke at 1:30 writing in my head another chapter of yesterday's posting, so here I am at 2:00 a.m. and away we go!

This past year, we have been as travelers of old, circling a new town, camping some and moving around it, curious and contemplating what it would/will be like to enter the gates of that unknown constabulary to make it our own.

It's exciting sometimes to wonder what is there and how we will fit in. And often it has felt odd, as if we will not know ourselves there when finally we go, go in, go to meet whatever will be ours. And that is not comfortable. We have felt a bit off-balance; something so new with so much to offer and yet...

This blog has helped me feel more tethered, more centered. I watched Oprah's interview with J.K. Rawlings yesterday. It was a great interview, and they are alike in many astonishing ways. Rawlings said something I know well. She said, "Often I didn't know it until I wrote it." Her books are truly a trip she took inside herself to that unknown place where she was Becoming.

Writers, I believe, more often than not, learn themselves by writing.

I learn myself by writing what appears to be a message to all of you, and with each idea that appears on my computer screen Consciousness expands; I am more than I was before. I am closer into that as yet undisclosed district that holds so much invention.

Wavering though we may seem to be out on the fringes of that new territory, we can feel not bold, not determined. But we are brave. We have traveled this far to observe what Becomes the place we gather. And while camping and sleeping out on the fringe, we dream ourselves inside this new, intriguing municipality, exploring in sleep what intimidates in our waking hours. We are brave.

The journey takes not so much courage as we might imagine, standing and observing and wondering if we can, indeed, enter this exciting, intimidating realm. We are explorers, after all, and with each foray, whether in sleep or day-trip, we touch it, taste it, then scurry back to the three-dimensional safety of the Known, on the fringe, to rest a bit.

We need not force ourselves out of our comfort zone. Those dreams and day-trips take courage, too, and prove so much. We are bold, we are brave. Already the journey has proven more than we could have imagined. With each foray we trust ourselves more.

The journey has never been about trusting the Unknown, out there.

It's always been about trusting ourselves.

This new gathering place will not abandon us. It will still be there tomorrow. Even as we camp on the fringes, we are absorbing the energy of it, adapting as we observe. It takes courage to stand and learn, to know ourselves better.

Taking a deep breath,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Boldly Striding into 2011

Greetings from the End of 2010!

The holidays sure cut into my energy to post here, not to mention all the compressed energy on our dear planet which also required some management. But here we are, and because I am so much in the flow of gratitude these days, I'm going to review a place we've visited before. I've just erased my last sentence in which I said there is no such thing as too much gratitude, but I've seen obsession in all practices, so....

Gratitude becomes a state of mind after we practice it for awhile. It may sound redundant, but I am so grateful that I learned along the way that gratitude is essential to living a whole, balanced life.

I've pretty much, with the exception of a very dark period when my thyroid failed, been a Pollyanna. Glad for this, glad for that, pretty positive and grateful throughout. Sincerely. I don't relate to pretense about gratitude. Say it out loud, feel it in my body, breathe deeply and send it out, absorbing it as it returns. Not that there is time to do that whole process every time I feel and express gratitude, but when I can, that's the cycle.

Curious about why and how, I've asked questions about gratitude. I started asking about the physics of gratitude when the "gratitude journal" trend started. Along the way I've learned that the expression of gratitude activates an exchange with our physical world and expands out to engage The All That Is.

Repeating: Consciousness is one experience. It is one thing, so whatever it is that we put into it, changes it. A note: Let's not obsess about this. What we put in that we wish we hadn't can be changed, and our experience in reversing it has value, too.

Gratitude opens the heart - or that part of our physical being that feels like our heart. When we express gratitude with breath, that part of us opens and the energy expresses outward. As it moves into Consciousness, it communicates to others and expands out to The All That Is.

The physics of this boggles my mathematically-challenged mind, but I know that it is real. I feel it for myself and Wisdom has shown it to me with vivid imagery and energy. As it moves out into the Cosmos, it engages with everyone who is related to the experience you are having and they, in turn, are moved to respond, to enthusiastically agree with you and to cooperate with whatever it is that you need.

Gratitude, then, is a significant element in Creation. So, considering how we project an intention or visualize what we want, incorporating gratitude in that creation activates the Consciousness. For instance, these days we are creating "the perfect assisted living place" for Mom. To activate that creation, I incorporate gratitude: "I am grateful for the perfect assisted living place for Mom." Breathe and surrender it. In other words, it is done. We have created it, we are so grateful and we let it go.

At this reflective time of year, we naturally express gratitude for what was. We can engage with and create what is that we choose for 2011. Out of our Wisdom and in alignment with the greater good, we are pioneers in this expansive Creation. Take a deep breath and dare to create the dream. Let's be bold, striding into 2011 with the confidence of The All That Is. See you there!

Until then,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Merry, Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

The energy of this season is so amazing! On the one (mittened) hand we carry the joy of the birth of Christ, on the other hand, we feel the pressures of the season.

A warm note: some of us get away from it all and enjoy the sun in Alabama, Georgia, Florida, Hawaii, etc., so hello to all of you who choose warmer weather. I don't know how I'd celebrate without all the snow, though, so I've chosen and will just shut up about the 5-foot snowbanks.

I treasure Christmas. I hold all the warm memories close to me and shun the new trend to be politically correct with greetings of, "Happy Holidays!" I celebrate the birth of Christ with much joy and gratitude, yet I am not a traditional Christian.

I go through many of the traditional rituals, though my goal is to embrace only those traditions I can manage with ease. Cards seem not to be my style anymore. I love the ones I receive and try to relax my traditional response. I love the trees and lights in the windows of my neighbors, thank them in my heart, and am grateful that as an apartment dweller my doing less is possible without explanation.

This year it seems I've done all I can do while also attending the shifting energy of the planet. This Solstice rotation has been a challenge and a blessing in service. I'm reflecting longingly on the days not long ago when I was sleeping 8 hours a night. These days I find myself awake at 4:00 a.m., opening my heart to the day with gratitude, honoring what I can do for our planet, while gratefully accepting all the help I can get to take care of life. Thank you, God, for meditation naps!

I am so grateful to have partners who understand the dichotomy. How would we hold our balance without dear friends in body and in Spirit who share the assignment and support us on this astonishing journey. The new planet in this crystal frequency is still learning itself, as you and I are learning ourselves, differently from the way humans have ever done before us.

Oh, what gratitude and wonder. Macy's was busy yesterday, as we were there for Santa and the show. We couldn't have picked a better day; 30 deg. weather, and absolutely NO lines! Santa, we decided, was the real Santa, not a helper. He was perfect, from his real beard to his twinkling eyes. Andrea and I agreed, we loved best of all the gorgeous, animated trees in the Elves show. Shannon would not disclose what she whispered in Santa's ear, secretive and busy enjoying her cotton-candy-flavored ice cream.

Christmas Eve is dinner and gifts at their house, then off to a church service that includes the children. Christmas day is at Mom's. I chose a simple oven meal to simplify our day, and Mom will make her traditional fruit salad, especially to please my cousin, Cheryl, who no longer has many memories - except the holiday fruit salad we all enjoy.

For all of you, I wish warm memories and joy in the celebration of Christ who brings us the message of love. His mystical energy lifts us out of the stress and into the crystal frequency of New Earth. This Christmas, as never before, we celebrate the birth of a new life.

Until our next visit,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Secrets and Beliefs

Greetings!

"Secrets kill."

Yesterday, in a process very involved and still moving through layers of integration and understanding, I explored in meditation deep layers of belief; beliefs about a number of things that affect the quality of my life. Then last night I had a dream involving disease passed on from one person to another; disease that when kept secret created an epidemic killing many. The final message was, "Secrets kill."

I've given this some thought this morning and realize the two experiences, beliefs and secrets, are related in our current cycle of human evolution.

We all have secrets; parts of ourselves that remain private because they affect no one else and which are parts of the personality through which we are evolving. Because they are private, we feel the freedom to explore them at our own pace, perhaps revealing them once we feel secure in what we have achieved. And some private parts of us will never be revealed because they are as personal to us as our genetic makeup.

Secrets that kill are secrets we keep because we are ashamed or self-conscious of these thoughts, behaviors or conditions. We believe at some level that if the secret were revealed we would not be loved or accepted; worse, we fear we would be judged, even shunned. Fear is the key word here.

Secrets that are kept because we are afraid will kill us because fear is the opposite of love, and love is necessary to create a balanced environment, whether that is in our external or internal world.

So this post is not about running willy-nilly through our lives purging all of our secrets to achieve balance. No. This is about breathing and feeling into our secrets to ask ourselves how we feel while holding on to them. And I personally find that approaching one secret at a time is manageable, while feeling all of the private thoughts at once feels too defeating. So the key is not to layer one on the other. Layering, in fact, may be an escape mechanism; what feels too big we will avoid at all costs.

Sharing a secret eventually may prove cathartic. Having explored its effect in life and released the fear, we may be inspired to share it as part of the steps we take to be fully free of its toxic

effect. There are no rules. You are Creator of all of your beliefs and rules, so you decide.

We may also find, in exploring what we hold in secret, that it turns out to be a belief about ourselves that would not have meaning or importance to anyone else. In fact, this you may find this is true more often than not. And then we can appreciate how we have poisoned our systems, creating physical symptoms which are the result of a secret we have held in fear.

Wisdom now says, "All secrets held in fear are poison to your bodies - physical, mental and emotional. Symptoms will appear somewhere. This is your journey. Ease or dis-ease. Always your choice."

Wishing you Ease,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Exploring Soul

Greetings!

Soul comes up as a subject to explore this morning. And because it is very cold in Minneapolis, and the soul seems a lovely warm place to me, it feels appropriate.

I have never explored the beliefs of other cultures regarding soul, and my influence is primarily Christian, so I will use those to reflect on what I have learned since opening to Wisdom.

We were taught that the soul is within us; that each of us has a soul of our own and that it holds all the parts of us that we are working to correct. We also learned that the soul belongs to God.

Our soul is the part of us that knows God and when we die it goes back to God. This has confused me. How can the soul hold both our problem and our perfection? Now, even Christian teachings differ on some of these details, and that confused me even more.

Wisdom has taught me a very different way of thinking about Soul. "Imagine, they said, "that in the beginning a limited number of souls were created. And for the sake of discussion, imagine that only 144,000 souls were created. Just that many and no more for all of eternity."

That set me back on my heals. With all the human beings who have occupied the planet since the beginning of time, that would have to mean that we would have to share souls. What other explanation could there be? So I asked for further information.

Each person is unique in the Cosmos. Each has themes or assignments to fulfill in his or her journey on the planet. And each is a facet or spark of a larger soul. So there are soul families or groups and each person is related by their soul to one another. Our human family, related by blood, is a way to think about a similar relationship.

Souls are magnificent creations, each carrying common assignments or themes. The goal is that each soul complete itself by fulfilling its assignments for the whole. Once all assignments are achieved; once all souls are filled with all the human experience necessary to complete those themes, then all souls will return to the core of Cosmic Consciousness.

As we take this journey on Earth, the Soul serves as our personal Resource Center. From Soul we are sustained and inspired to achieve our life assignments. I like to use a quart crystal cluster as an example. You are the crystal extension, growing from the base cluster (Soul).

The base cluster is drawing energy from Earth. In this illustration, Earth represents Creator.

As we grow and change, mature and achieve our goals, our facets multiply; we continue to draw on Soul, and Soul draws on Creator. We are always supported and supplied. The connection cannot be broken.

Your personal share of Soul is the energy that connects you to all others of your Soul Group and insures that the Cosmic Conversation continues. You meet others of your group and feel a connection. It can be powerful. These connections help us to exercise the human dynamic. Relationships insure that we complete our assignments, and those we share with others of our Soul Group are particularly compelling.

Soul, then, is as Christians teach, both our challenges and our solutions. But absent of the concept of sin, we choose and learn and Become with Soul as the incomprehensible backup System. The absence of external judgement lifts us up and places us squarely and simply in choice. We are choosing and expanding Mind. Becoming does not just mean for or of myself. Becoming means fulfilling a greater Consciousness as well as realizing my personal adventure.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis still Becoming

Across the Globe, Peace

Greetings!

Having previously related an incident in my building that triggered old vulnerabilities, I thought that a follow-up would be natural. Also, relating this experience, I further integrate what passed between me and my neighbors yesterday. Intention, then action, are good, but integration completes the cycle.

Breathing into "right timing," I was inspired to knock on their door about 4 p.m. and found that the young man, a high school senior, was home to interpret, and his mother and father were there relaxing. They enthusiastically invited me into their home, served me a delicious fruit drink, and told me how happy they were that I had come to visit.

They speak Arabic and have been in America from their homeland, Iraq, only since June. Each of them speaks some of our language, but the son is most fluent. He informed me that he had been excused from an after-school practice, so he was home 2 hours early and his mother had been in hospital for a minor procedure two days earlier. The synchronicity delighted all of us.

They are very happy in our neighborhood and told me that the neighbors are friendly and very helpful. I, in turn, told them that when I went to Holy Land Market, the owner, an Arab, helped me to choose the right gift for an Iraqi family. We all agreed that the world is becoming a more integrated community and we are happy to see it evolving.

Baghdad, they tell me, is a multi-cultural community. Though Muslim, they celebrate Christmas and believe all paths lead to one God. Tears come once again as I feel how touched I am by these warm, like-minded neighbors. And I could have missed this.

I could have let the incident of two months ago become a wall between us. In the card I gave them, I reflected on the song, "Let There Be Peace on Earth." What I did not know until yesterday was that I did not take the first step toward peace. Some time recently they attempted to deliver a traditional Iraqi dinner to me, but I was not home. The woman would like us to meet occasionally to practice her English. I will be learning some Arabic. Who could have guessed!

Our step is just one of the many steps being taken across the planet; steps necessary to achieve peace. What governments may try to do, people, one on one, achieve. We all agreed that the more we know one another, the less we fear. The less we fear, the more we realize we are alike.

Wishing you all Peace, Now,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Choices with Ease

Greetings!

Being human is all about choices, isn't it? This or that, up or down, fly or drive, shop or stay home, Best Buy or Walmart. And making choices is exercising free will. The catch is, we only want to make the right choice. Now, System will tell us that any choice is the right choice. We can't miss. From each choice we learn, and learning is what being human is all about.

Today I am exploring how to choose with increasing accuracy; choosing to achieve an outcome we prefer. Choice then becomes an exciting exercise in living with ease.

Surprise, surprise, breath is the key to choosing with greater assurance. We can and do improve the quality of our lives when we can relax into choosing. We don't need to hear voices in response to questions about what to do, how to choose, although this can and does also happen when we pose a question and breathe.

Again, for clarity, breathing is the natural means to release our mental and emotional activity.

Choices are not made accurately from logic or emotion. It is certainly possible to choose while also using logical process, but our accuracy is hugely enhanced by relaxing logic and emotion with breath. Logical process increases tension in the body because it is from our density. Physical, mental and emotional conditions are borne of Earth. Wisdom/Mind is borne of Spirit.

Breath releases us to our Wisdom, releasing the denser parts. And from Wisdom all is Known. Trusting this creates an environment through which a choice serves us better.

Example: Yesterday I went out on errands and needed ink cartridges for my printer. Office Max does not carry Kodak inks, but I was told I could get them at Best Buy. I set out and made two other stops, then breathed and realized I was thinking about Walmart. Walmart is not my shopping preference, but it is closer to me. Then I thought about the ink again and breathed - again. With Best Buy and Walmart in front of me as options, I breathed again. When I thought about Walmart my body relaxed. Letting go of logic, I drove to Walmart. Not only did they have my ink, I was able to buy three other items that had been on my list for a while. I did not think about what I needed, just breathed, wandering through the store, finding each item with ease. How lovely.

This example is just one that illustrates we need no special skills to live with greater ease.

We all breathe. We can all tell when our system is tensed or relaxed. Like any other skill, we get better the more we practice. How important is the quality of our lives? Where do we choose to use our energy?

Exercising free will is the way we learn, and it turns out that how we learn to use our free will teaches us even more.

Wishing you ease, now and always,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Cosmic Change

Greetings!

The photo today of the solar filament on NASA's site - I go to "space weather" on my search engine - is simply spectacular and well worth your time to visit. The image is remarkably like an angel and promises to last for a while yet before collapsing. Since I don't believe in coincidence, and NASA is not in the business of creating spiritual images, I am touched by this. What a privilege to have such easy access to photos of our Cosmos and its changing face.

Nancy O. tuned me into the site and today's image. For the past several months we have been remarking also on the shift in the sun's rising location and of the change in the light. As long as I have lived here, it has never before risen so far on either side of the east. We know our axis has shifted, as reported by our scientists, but when we see the difference in the light we can take so much for granted, the impression is deep. It changes us within.

We are so aware that the journey we take is new. We feel differently; we encounter life in such an altered state. What we are able to see is changed. Other dimensions are more visible, and our vision is altered by internal evolution.

In fact, we do not have sufficient language to speak with authority about what we have created and what seems to have been created around us without our permission. The change is similar to a new fruit showing up on a plate in front of us. Would we even know it was a fruit? Aren't we more comfortable eating something when we can name it and define its purpose for our system?

Breath is the way to adjust to this change. Breath allows our Inner Wisdom to inform us, to identify the new, and it helps us to relax into accepting the new reality in each evolving stage. While we have explored this previously on these pages, I believe it helps us to breathe more easily and to adapt with greater ease when we talk about it.

We explore and Become. And while changes certainly are occurring outside of us, the most wondrous discoveries of all lie in the terrain within.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Whose Script is this Anyway?

Greetings!

Another lovely client prompts this posting on a cold and snowy December morning. I am so grateful for a warm home; for family and friends in this dimension and in Spirit whose warmth is like a glowing fireplace. And how grateful I am for the people who expand the Consciousness by their curiosity and willingness to take what is often the more difficult path.

Our traditional path is one more often focused on the external journey. We are prone to reacting to the behaviors and conditions of people around us. We do not intend to judge, but we are trained to see in others what might be changed and react as if we know what might work better for them, all in the name of caring for them and wishing them the best of life. I cannot count all the ways this behavior has occupied my thoughts and controlled my life. Whew!

The means to achieving a life of balance, of peace, is to instead focus on the interior journey. As we are able to shift attention, redirecting our attention from reaction to breath, we can do this!

The centerpiece of my external journey is my life with Dick McCoy. Sixteen years of judging, reacting, "fixing," and wishing it were all different still causes me to shudder. It is true that this man was not an easy assignment; not for me, not for him. In the name of "helping him," I tried a lot of things. And at the same time did try to take care of myself. But he was the reason, I was sure, that I was so unhappy. He was the source of pain in our family. His behaviors surely stood out as evidence. It is true that we suffered from his anger. It is true that the tension in our home was palpable. And it is true that my reaction to him left no room for change.

We were frozen in a dynamic that controlled us and left little room for joy.

I filed for divorce in 1978. Lo and behold, divorced, single, I was still the same unhappy person. I had not changed. I had only changed the circumstances. But from that place we each began a journey toward knowing ourselves better. Without him, I had nothing to push against. And once I replaced the resistance with internal reflection, I had to face myself. This came slowly, but it did come. It's quite a challenge to face the fact that our part in the script is equal to the part of one whose behaviors are more obvious.

Most of us can look at our lives and ask who out there in our world plays this role for us. They give us something to push against - or to embrace - with the belief that if we just stick long enough, try hard enough, they will change. Perhaps the latter is the more engaging and dangerous, because we live in the illusion of an altruistic pursuit.

Every one of us is fulfilling a self-directed assignment. And every one of the people in our lives is cooperating in providing us what we need to achieve it. Those like my former husband - now deceased - provide the most obvious roles to trigger what we are here to learn. My "home" work was powerful. He couldn't have played his role more effectively for what I had assigned myself to learn. I did not trust myself, so how in the world could I expect that he would provide me a partner I could trust?

Some people, friends, siblings, parents, co-workers, neighbors, politicians, priests and pilgrims may present opportunities for us to know ourselves better with roles not so obvious. Their behaviors may be more subtle. The script they are reading may be very loving or filled with authority, yet triggering us in certain behaviors that are unique to them. But they are persistent. And they are cooperating with us at levels that may surprise us. They must hold their place in our script until we wake one day and say, "Wow, this is my script. What I have written no longer serves me best?

It is not about them; this is all from me and about me?! And I can rewrite it!"

We can rewrite the script by shifting our attention from that other person or situation with BREATH. One breath, or 10 when necessary, shifts attention from the external stimulation to the Sacred within. Oh, their script will be compelling. We may struggle. After all, their behavior has engaged us; if they will just read their lines differently all will be solved and they will be surely be happier. (And, oh by the way, I will feel better.)

The Sacred within is the place where, when we breathe long enough, our Spirit reveals to us the means to live in a new reference point. It informs us, with an epiphany, or over time, what we can do to live the more peaceful life. It reveals the theme, the essence of the assignment, as we are able to relax and allow it. In those moments of clarity we reclaim ourselves. And we know love.

We are such curious and extraordinary beings! How creative we are. How persistent in our scripts. We pursue our assignments, no matter how challenging. Because there is not judgment from those in Spirit who love us, they are not impatient with us. They support us in our struggles and in our victories. We are learning ourselves as best we can and we are expanding Consciousness with every adventure in the human condition. We are very brave. And we are loved.

Until the next page in this script,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Benefits of Virtual Realities

Greetings!

Hello, December, and hello to all of you with whom I share this amazing journey.

A lovely client last night prompts more thought about our realities, so thought sharing it with you I might realize even more wisdom from it.

Her Group likened all the scenarios in our lives to virtual reality games we choose to play or to simply observe. In her situation, and in our lives as well, we live a good deal of our lives reacting to the expectations and influences of other people. Or perhaps it is a situation that does not involve us, except that we observe it and it trigger something within us. Do I want to involve myself in the realities of others, or do I choose to stand apart, observing and allowing all of that virtual reality play itself out without me.

That doesn't mean we are not involved. Observing, we are involved to some degree. And if I react, it is because somewhere within my Plan, I recognize a situation not yet personally resolved. It is mine, somehow, somewhere. Consciousness being what it is, we cannot be separate. The question is, how much of my energy will I invest in the scenario. The more I react, the more it controls me; the more it controls me, the more I react.

An aging person I know who feels an increasing loss of control in her own life, reacts strongly to a friend whose situation seems out of balance and detrimental to her well being. While completely understandable in our 3-D world, the reaction dims her own joy. Conversation about every person's Perfect Plan doesn't "fix" the situation for my friend. That's OK, it's not mine to fix, but I feel it's OK to contribute where I can, breathe and let it go. Sometimes it is clear that I need simply to breathe, observe the person or situation in the Sacred and release it.

Learning is in the observing. Where do I react most? What does that say about me and how does it apply to my own experience? Judgement aside, observing teaches so much. We are human so we are going to react. Breath takes us from reaction to observing; perhaps releasing it from our own 3-D reality, placing it instead on a virtual reality screen simply to observe.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Dogs and Altruism

Greetings!

This from Nancy O. tickled me: What does a dyslexic agnostic do when he can't sleep? He lies awake wondering if there is a dog.

After a few days dog-sitting while my son and family were away for Thanksgiving, I love this joke all the more. Their dogs are Bel, Ursa and Luna, all females and all large, loving dogs, each with a distinct personality, and all characters. As I observed them, I was amazed at the tactics they use to get what they want and was struck again by their undisguised greediness.

Domesticated animals are here to serve us. And the unconditional love they offer us is priceless. Their attention, though, is a conundrum. Do they really offer us attention without expectation, or is all their attention based on what they need from us? As human beings, how often do we really offer ourselves or our gifts without expectation or association of some kind?

In this season of gratitude and giving/receiving I ponder again the human condition and how much of what we offer is unconditional. People who give anonymously are rare. An amazing couple at the church we attend is matching charitable gifts, up to $5000 each, and encouraging gifts of at least $100. They announced this a church, and were duly applauded for this generous offer. I am as impressed as anyone, and I do not question their altruism.

At the same time I am reminded of a movie, Magnificent Obsession, that so inspired me years ago. In it, a doctor dies and his wife is visited by a deluge of people who want to tell her how much they owe her husband. He would give them gifts of money and tell them there were two conditions: they could tell no one and they could never repay the money. If they tried, he would tell them he couldn't take it; it was "all used up," and encouraged them to "give to some other poor devil." He payed out the energy and believed in doing so that it was used up in the giving. And it had to be anonymous. This is true altruism. Pay it Forward also explored this principle.

When we give at the U. U. church, because they believe in a budget based on knowing what funds will be available, we are asked to pledge. I understand the dynamics, but I was taken aback when I received a pledge review by mail. Thinking how I could do this differently, I realized I could continue to give anonymously or I could comply with pledging and help the church budget its monies. As long as I choose to attend this church with Mom, I owe them accountability because it is their way. But you can see that I'm not comfortable with it.

By contrast, my home church in Duluth does not ask a pledge. We pay an annual membership fee, the amount determined by our conscience, and an offering is taken each Sunday. What a marvel to me that they are fiscally stable and have managed all of this largely with anonymous contributions and a volunteer board.

The beliefs of a person or a church become their reality. Beliefs manifest in the physical world.

We are alchemists. We create our circumstances. If we believe people must be accountable, and if we operate with a need to be acknowledged, then true altruism is not at work. I believe this is a belief that limits creation.

I realize that I am supporting a core metaphysical principle which is not comfortable for all of us yet. And I believe that when we are able to release accountability, we will have evolved to a place in our creation when we will be tapping the All That Is without restriction. The Flow will be well beyond what we now enjoy. And we are evolving. I believe that each time we make an anonymous contribution, whether that is with money or some other gesture, we expand Consciousness toward our goal of unfettered Flow.

And think how nice and empty the mailbox will be!

Breathing with you,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Designing the New Self

Greetings and a Happy Thanksgiving to All!

A generous and inspiring friend allows me to share her epiphany with all of you as a centerpiece for this posting.

Changing self is the only change. Whatever in life that does not please us, if we want to change it, the change will come through self or not at all. And don't we run the gambit of alternatives in search of the happiness we know we deserve, but which seems just out of reach?

Often System has told us that we do not begin change at the point of realization. We have begun the change, and then the realization comes as part of the process. This is true of my friend. The epiphany is a punctuation mark to tell us how far we have come, and that having bravely taken the journey, we are able to reveal the Wisdom of it.

We are always in a state of change. As System told me many years ago: Your questions mean you are not stuck. People who are stuck don't know there is a question. I love this bit of Wisdom. It has comforted me often. If I am anything, I am curious. The hunger to know, or to at least think I know, is a constant in my life.

Change begins with me. The musical piece, "Let There Be Peace on Earth," says it so well. "Let peace begin with me. Let this be the moment now." The change toward peace must begin within me, just as any change in our world must begin here. And how am I to affect peace except by feeling it within and expressing it in the greater Consciousness.

A couple of weeks ago I reported an incident of violent behavior in my building that triggered old vulnerabilities. While I can say that I have resolved my inner drama, I have not gone the next step to contact my neighbor. Language barriers seemed a good reason not to reach out. I've investigated the Islamic calendar and see that December 7 is their New Year celebration. On that day I will make a gesture of peace and hope this will bring me back into harmony with my next-door neighbors. Waiting for a gesture from the source of the drama may seem logical, but if peace is to be, it must begin with me. My personal peace is more important than how I might be perceived by them. And so the remedy is a gesture; one with no expectations.

I've marveled in the past at stories of people who reach out to establish a relationship with an individual who has committed a crime against them; a mother who reaches out to the drunk driver who killed her daughter; the man who finds within forgiveness for the the woman who wrongly accused him of rape and cost him several years of his life in prison. Courage and a desire to change self must motivate them. It has the healing effect on the other person, but the inspiration comes from a desire to achieve change within self. They all tell the same story.

Today is a new and sunny day. Change is going on within and I see it all around me. Shifting to accommodate change is a daily journey. We can breathe and flow with it, or focus on it and freeze it in time, struggling and wishing it were not so. The evidence of our choice is so powerful.

In gratitude for all the people in my life, changing and courageously persisting, I celebrate this holiday and hope for all of you great ease and joy.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Support System, Part II

Greetings!

Aunt Phyl is on my mind this morning, so I am reminiscing and meandering. She was/is a character; my mother's aunt, therefore my great-aunt. Everyone should be blessed to have such a character in their lives. She was a small woman, with a snap in her eyes and a sharp wit. Mother and I decided she must have been an "It Girl" in her time. She did have "it," attracting the attention of men even in her later years. A self-professed flapper in her day, she loved riding behind handsome gentlemen on their motorcycles.

Aunt Phyl began life as Philemon, a French name she hated. So when she could, she changed it to Phyllis. When I came along Mother named me for her, and I am grateful. Raised Catholic, she bent and broke rules the Pope probably never thought to write down. She was married twice and had a child with each man. I knew her daughters, and they were as different as night and day.

Her life was not easy. She and her sisters, one of whom is our maternal grandmother, were farmed out to relatives when they were quite young; when their father married a French woman who did not like them. Aunt Phyl learned to appreciate life and she had a selfish streak that gave me a lot to think about as I grew to know her. Her sharp tongue let you know where she stood and what she wanted.

We celebrated our January birthdays together a few times, and on her 90th we celebrated at Mom's, with their cousin, Richard. She reflected on her age as we were leaving and said, "I don't mind so much getting older, except my dingly-danglies fall to my knees!"

When she passed, just short of her 93rd birthday, I realized I would miss her more than most. That spark was special. And when I woke this morning, feeling her energy all around me, I needed to take this time to honor her as she is, here and now, always.

Our Support Systems are more than we know. They consist of family and friends with whom we share our lives, both their 3-Dimensional and their Extra-Dimensional selves; the people who have left their human suit behind but continue relationship with us; the folks we've never met who are other aspects of us; the Masters and Angels who attend us. Our Support Systems exceed any linear understanding. Considering this expansive Consciousness, spiraling out and out, inward and ever inward, it's a travesty that we do not consciously and intentionally utilize it every moment of every day.

Our entourage is impressive. Thank you, each of you, for connecting with me, as I am grateful to connect with you. Thank you, Aunt Phyl, and each facet of my Support System for your service. I am more committed than ever to remembering how generously you offer your support, for those things that feel important and for items that feel insignificant; remembering what God told me: "Phyllis, whether it is world peace or a hangnail, if it feels important to you, then it is important to us."

Breathing into the Possible,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Curtain-Turning and Support Systems

Greetings to You and Winter!

Support Systems are on my mind this week, especially since a major curtain-turning incident over the weekend.

And now with new perspective from my sister's life, I'm really inspired to share it with you. An unexpected and perfect experience filled Judith's life yesterday. A friend from her study group was in physical crisis, and Judith became his support system, driving him to the hospital and calling his family to notify them of his situation. She was so grateful to realize the presence of his wife who passed several years ago, guiding Judith, comforting her husband and obviously providing the Support System they both needed.

What amazing design kaleidoscopically turns and falls into place to create such an opportunity for serving and being served? It's a curious and spectacular plan, isn't it? Judith was willing to serve; she was also open and willing to accept the help that was available. Balance.

Where do we serve and where are we served? What service of yours is so precious as this? I hope you appreciate what you offer others, whether it seems significant to you at the time.

God says, "You are here to learn yourself, and hopefully to learn to love yourself along the way." How are we to learn to love ourselves unless we can appreciate the value of our service?

Considering this, I breathe deeply to feel the exchange I've had with a person or in a situation where I am grateful to have served. I'm getting better at it, yet we all need more practice.

I've probably shared with you my curtain-turning experience, but if you haven't read the earlier blog entry, I'll share it again: About two years ago I noticed the pretty edge of the heavy, cotton lace panel in my bedroom turned. It was clearly not the way I had hung it. I turned it back - only to find it generously turned again soon afterward. I usually find the turning in the morning, but just to make sure I'd believe it, once it was turned so far outward while I was in the shower that I couldn't argue anymore. When I get the message I sometimes have found it returned to its natural position. Those in Spirit who love me use it to make a statement.

My first reaction was, what am I doing wrong, or what am I not doing. Over time I've realized that the message if simply and clearly a statement of support. When I am most in need, the curtain is turned. On Friday it was turned again, and the message was so clear: "We are your Support System." Strong encouragement to lean into that System comforts me and reminds me that I need more practice asking for help to support everything I do.

We all have Support Systems. And the support we offer others is not to be handled alone. The challenge and the blessing is to breathe deeply into the All That Is, ask for help, then open fully to receive the awesome support always there to partner with us - in whatever we do.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Sacrifice and Indulgence

Greetings!

Simplicity and indulgence seem to be my themes this morning. Contemplating Christmas this year means catalogues and shopping ahead. The hustle and bustle of shopping the week before the big day used to give me a holiday feeling. No more. Selections from the ease of my sofa appeal to me this year, and I suspect for all those years to come.

Catalogues are finding me this year as never before. I am delighted that the Vermont Country Store offers candies from my childhood. Crystal Creams were always my favorite. In the catalogue they are called French Creams; colorful creamy candies coated with crystallized sugar. And I'll order Mom's favorite, Cream Filberts. The prices are outrageous, but since they are the only candies I'll buy for Christmas - and they evoke such strong childhood memories - they are worth it.

We all have memories and hungers it may not be possible to satisfy so simply as this. We may, in fact, accumulate more hungers and their guilty associations than we resolve. We are culturally influenced to deny those hungers as if they are insignificant, or worse, selfish indulgences.

Denying our hungers and pressing ourselves for service to the point of sacrifice leave us with deep hungers. These yearnings are certainly deeper than any candy or other indulgence can satisfy. Compensating behaviors can become addictions, and as I was reminded in a session with a recovering alcoholic, shame very often follows.

When caught up in all the confusing feelings of addiction, it's not surprising that we fall into self-deprecation and shame. My sister once said, "The shame feels wrong." She is so right.

Judgement further represses the roots of the addictive behavior, prolonging the agony.

Guilt and shame will not bring us to the outcome we prefer.

Wisdom says that our behaviors are not to be judged. Our tendency is to judge ourselves or others, but those in Spirit who love us see these behaviors as the way we learn ourselves. Period. And learning ourselves is the reason we are walking around here in this human suit.

This is not intended to encourage our addictive behaviors, but to observe them as objectively as possible. How does this feel? What does it feel like afterward? What do I get out of this, or what price to I pay for this indulgence? Breathing is the key to accessing those feelings and to achieving the objectivity we need to move further away from the behavior.

So I will indulge myself in the healthiest ways I can and embrace the many ways to bring ease into my life. We deserve the ease. We've lived the cycle of self-sacrifice and we've learned as much about that condition as we need to. We are people of service and that will not cease. We now learn to live in service without sacrifice. The residual effects of sacrifice are still with us, and now we explore the means to climb out of that trench and into the light of Third Earth.

Breathing with you,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Rhythms

Greetings!

I do have gratitude, but felt I'd overworked the greeting ~:-)

In past posts I've sure worn you out with reminders to breathe and release; to rest within self.

I had another reminder this morning of the reasons we do well to breathe therapeutically and find that Sacred Space within.

I was reaching out to answer the phone soon after I got up - and realized the phone hadn't rung yet, simultaneously realizing it was about to. And sure enough it did, and it was Mom. Nothing at all serious, by the way. After the call I found myself singing, "Rhythm, I have rhythm," to the tune of, "Heaven, I'm in heaven, and my heart..."

Rhythm is the reason to breathe and release. Our hearts work in rhythm, our breath is in rhythm - even shallow breathing - and our electrical impulses and pulses are rhythmic. The point is, our System knows rhythm and feels so much better, operates with harmony and ease, when we intentionally breathe deeply and regularly.

The longer we practice this rhythm, the more rhythmic is the life we lead; phone calls, spontaneous activity of all kinds. Rhythm within, rhythm without. We respond to inner signals to lead a more rhythmic life, and this applies to everything. Living a life of increasing ease is something we all desire and a goal we can all achieve and enjoy. I'm practicing with you.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Help! Yes, There is Help

Greetings in Gratitude!

Just how far do we take an issue/a situation before we surrender it? When do we, or when are we willing finally to turn it over? Whose belief system isn't drenched with haunting voices that tell us we must do our very best to chase down the resolution, to reason it out, and to do the very best we can to understand it so that we can explain it others or convince them we know the best way to reach a happy ending? Whew! We sure have a lot of conditioning to outgrow.

And so often, when we are involved in a complex situation, we are also have a tendency to shift perspective, looking through the eyes of others who are involved. As we have discussed previously, this is dangerous territory. Any time we split our perspective, our anxiety mounts because we are giving away our power. Our attention is split, and our System, knowing this way of operating serves no one, fills us with symptoms/anxiety to notify us to change our approach.

The only approach to any old or new issue is to breathe and release - just as soon as we possibly can. We're so wonderful. We are courageous and determined and faithful. We do so much better than we think we can, and we deserve relief. Relief comes from breathing and breathing again, asking for help and surrendering until we feel all the mechanisms fall away. We have so much help available.

Yesterday a client asked about how to improve the ability to channel. There is no need for us to be intimidated by the word, "channeling." We all do it all the time, but it is so much a part of us that we don't realize what it is - until we begin studying Consciousness. If we have a desire to expand our Consciousness, there are certain things we can do to improve our reception.

1. Drinking water is essential. We are electrical beings who operate best when fully hydrated.

2. Breathing helps us sustain an image or message until it is fully expressed. We do have a tendency to get mentally busy, interpreting what we are seeing or "hearing." Breathing helps us to collapse the mental and sustains the message.

3. Speaking aloud to our support group/angels & guides, helps to evaporate our ideas of separation from all of those who would support and communicate with us. And they do always support us, but when we imagine separation (and those beliefs can be strong) we create separation.

4. Reconsider the idea of what "hearing" means. On occasion, we hear physical voices from our guides. More often, we receive through a stream of Consciousness that runs parallel with our own. Using the technique of breathing therapeutically allows messages to enter our awareness.

Still Becoming in this area, especially when receiving my own counsel, I deeply appreciate the discovery process and treasure the results.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

If It's Hard, It Isn't Meant to Be

Greetings in Gratitude!

Today I nearly forgot my own rule: "If it's meant to be, it will flow."

And over the weekend, preparing a meal for my family, I did forget it, so here in the light of a lovely November 1st, I am reaffirmed. If it's hard, if it doesn't flow, STOP. It isn't meant to be, at least in the way I'm doing it. And what an opportunity to streamline life.

The meal was from the heart. The dish kept challenging me; the ingredients, the preparation.

But I kept on, and the result was digestible, but it wasn't the dish I first envisioned. I had changed it in favor of "doing something new." And no one complained, but I wasn't satisfied. When I went to bed last night, I asked what it was about. So.....

This morning I got up and checked my land line and had no service. Now, to tell you the story of the cable company and the phone company (that also provides my wireless service) would only give you a headache and further congest the issue. Any of you who have gone to the ropes with either of these technical octopuses already understands.

Yes, the more I explained and requested, the further into the abyss I went. First the phone folks, then the cable people, and back again, until, on the advice of one supervisor, I had the phone in my hand to explain and request again and it hit me: If it's meant to be, it will flow. I choose to have no landline, and I have dismantled my phones. If ever you called me on the 781 number, please erase it. I have my cell phone and it will do the job. I feel so much lighter.

Are you old enough to remember the 70's projections that were made for the technology of the future? It would simplify our lives. We would have so much time to relax. The truth is, humans have always found ways to complicate life as if the struggle justified our lives. My next step is to simplify my cable TV life. But not today.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

We've Got The Power

Greetings in Gratitude!

Life doesn't just happen. But think about how many ways we respond to our experience as if we have nothing much to do with it.

We are conditioned by our culture, by our family and by an existing Consciousness that holds our collective beliefs. So it is no wonder that from the smallest of things to the most pervasive conditions, we have a tendency to accept what is without investigation.

Now, it is true that we have explored much and evolved well beyond our ancestors' beliefs. And we are on a journey that will transform the planet. Here we are exploring and Becoming. So let's consider in what ways we have created, and the power we have now to create differently.

We might think of ourselves as alchemists. We use the energy within and around us to produce all that we need, from our groceries to the fulfillment of our dreams - or not. The same power that produces what we want and need also produces the absence of those things. In other words, there is no condition outside our creational realm. How, then, can we reject the right action of our world? It's not always what we would prefer, but it is always what we have created.

If it is not always what we prefer, and we know we have all this power, then this is a perfect time to reconsider and create the conditions in our lives in a form that we do prefer. I don't suggest that we have simply to wave a wand and everything would be transformed to our preference, but it's really a lot of fun to look at what we want and play around with it. We not only serve ourselves, but expand the Consciousness exponentially.

I used to believe that drying sheets with smaller items would cause lots of wrinkling when the small items tangled inside the sheets. And that's exactly what would happen. And it happened until I had just one dryer-full of items that included 2 sheets, and I decided to visualize all items tumbling separately and unwrinkled. And that's exactly what happened and still does.

If we can visualize a parking place in a crowded area, we can create anything. Some things seem inconsequential, yet affect our level of ease and bring us joy. Some things we have created exist at our depths, and we may need more time and loving observation to affect a change.

I love playing with recreating my life. And I keep creating new ways to explore power. This morning I realized I had a cumulative belief that I must work hard to earn what I have. This is not new to me, and I've revealed some of the layers already, but waking with thoughts of old, terrible babysitting jobs, I asked aloud what this was about and ran into the still-influencing belief.

We create not only the patterns, the belief systems, but also the means to bring these karmic threads to the surface and to relieve the affect of them. Breathing sure helps to release the pressure and to reveal the Wisdom we need to achieve what we prefer. With Wisdom we have life-changing Power. With our in-born Power, anything is possible.

Joyful to be on the Journey with you,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Madness or Magic?

Greetings in Gratitude!

Born in perfection, how can anything be wrong - in any aspect of our lives. Yet, our evolution is drenched with superstition and teachings ostensibly designed to protect us or to fill us with fear and guilt to shape our behaviors.

And how can we place blame with those who initiated, or grew into, the beliefs that human beings were not capable of choosing for themselves and needed the structure of religious and social rules/laws that still shape cultures across the planet? If we accept perfection in all things, then it's also true of those who developed the systems.

We are gradually changing this reaction to systems steeped in judgement; systems that dictate the ways we believe about ourselves. Fears of retribution are fading, replaced by an increasing assurance that we design our own patterns. Years ago I realized that having the responsibility for my life, the complementary side is the power to change it. We never have only one side of anything. If I have fear and love is the alternative, then the opposite is true, and both are within me at the same time. Opposites always coexist.

This remarkable evolution from limited thinking/reacting to expanding Consciousness and all the alternatives it holds is so exciting that I nearly jump out of my skin thinking about it.

As I was considering this in the shower this a.m., I saw our vibrational layers as an illustration of our evolution.

Visualize a pattern of horizontal layers, each layer vibrating at a different frequency, a bit like sound waves, each overlaying the other. The lowest vibration is when we were merely reactive, surviving but realizing very little free will. Gradually increasing in frequency, our vibration is at mid-range when we still feel controlled by systems that dictate our behaviors and our view of self.

These days we have not achieved the highest vibration if we are still in a physical body, but we can observe a higher frequency as we take back our power, less reactive and more proactive in our choices. As we shift our Consciousness to embrace our Wisdom and our creational capacity, we reach new vibrational levels.

This all came up as I wondered about dementia this morning. At what level are we operating in dementia? How does it relate to our vibration? It seems to me that dementia does not relate to Mind. Dementia relates only to brain function. Mind does not diminish. Mind can only expand as we evolve because every experience expands Consciousness. But the brain is subject to the effect of toxins, nutritional factors and the level of stimulation, to name a few we know.

I've observed folks demonstrating various levels of dementia who demonstrate strong intuitive skills; whose spontaneous responses give evidence that Mind continues operating while the logical, rule-based brain loses ground. I believe that the person in dementia is not operating at a lower vibration. I do wonder if, absent of the limitations of the left brain, the person is actually operating at a higher vibration than the seemingly "normal" person.

Once again curiosity has led me on a merry chase through Consciousness. Next time, the subject is, just how powerful is Mind, and what fun and practical things can we do with it?

Until then,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Greetings in Gratitude!

This overcast Saturday has sunshine in it. Family members with various health issues are all recovering nicely; from surgery, a stroke, pneumonia, and Mom's tests were clear. For all these reasons and more I am truly grateful today. Sunshine, indeed.

Times like these, when people we love are physically challenged, are times to reflect on what is truly important. From day to day we can lose track of the good. Our attention goes to what is most emotional, and it surely can feel big, compelling.

The emotional body is compelling, and it deserves our attention. If not recognized for its unique wisdom, the symptoms it represents become mental messages. If ignored there, the symptom goes to the physical where we are most likely to give it the attention it deserves.

Sometimes the emotions come in a tidal wave. Sometimes they prod us lightly. Getting better acquainted with our emotional messages as they are arise informs us to so many more layers of wisdom than we can imagine. Each of us is a storehouse of generations of memory and the wisdom associated those memories. Our current life is inevitably linked to those memories.

We do not need to recall the lifetime affecting us to benefit from the memory. The emotional body holds the essence of those lifetimes, which are linked to the assignments of our current lifetime. One experience comes to mind as an example.

Claustrophobia has always been an issue for me. But imagine my surprise when, several years ago, I had an anxiety attack as the result of agoraphobia (fear of open spaces). These two seem too opposite to both have meaning for one person, but when I reflected on the lifetime of Laurel, my WWII aspect who was held in a cage and abused in the concentration camp at Buchenwald; when I felt her complex fears, I could put it all together.

From that point I could allow myself the emotional reaction, breathe through it, speak to Laurel in Spirit, and reassure her that we are safe together. I also thank her for revealing my assignment this time around, linked as we are in our soul's history. I've seen enough of these correlating lifetimes through clients that I know the significance for all of us.

Each of us is a compilation of centuries of memories. They manifest as our contract or assignment for this lifetime, therefore expanding human Consciousness as we live and learn through it. Each of us can access what is significant through our emotions. We are all in charge of our own Creation, so each of us is capable of releasing symptoms that might otherwise compromise the quality of our lives. This is a big subject, so if you have questions that might be addressed through the "comment" section, I would be happy to explore this further.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Conscience and Consciousness

Greetings in Gratitude!

Let's start with the globe that came bouncing across the I35 bridge at me yesterday as I was driving Mom to the U. of M. Hospitals for her 4-year oncology checkup. (All is clear, and we are so grateful) I had to swerve to avoid this globe, and because I believe all experience is synchronisitic, (by the way, I know that's not a word) I first thought, "I wonder what that means?"

I'm going to assume its most direct message and focus additional attention on Earth; making myself more available to messages that help me help our planet - and that I can share with you so that we multiply our effect for our home. And now I know, there is more to share.

We simply have no idea to what extent we can help one another and the planet. Oh, yes, we see the effect in an act of kindness, or how we connect with a client, a neighbor, a friend; we know in obvious, physical actions, and we are told that somehow our breathing supports Mother Earth's labor. But the exponential effect of each act, each thought, each breath is beyond human understanding.

A woman I've known for many years takes so seriously the effect her life has on others that she hardly draws an easy breath, concerned as she is that she is not doing enough. That is not my assignment this lifetime, but I am prone to assuming more responsibility than is mine. I sometimes have to remind myself to breathe and release association with issues that are simply not mine to manage. So I know what it is to over-commit, and I know what it is to live the internal life that seems self-centered.

Recently I've talked with a number of parents whose young adult children seem to be living selfishly. This is not new behavior. Read quotes from pundits throughout years and we see evidence that young people have always been accused of selfishness. The young live internally, developing personalities we hope will prove their upbringing. It's typical of this stage that they demonstrate less care and concern for others - especially parents - and focus energy on building an independent life in which they can feel secure on their own. We can only trust what we have taught them, surrender - and look forward to grandchildren.

Service to others is a sign of maturation. Some show it earlier than others, but then there are those who seem never to "get it." The Unitarian Universalist church we attend is a community of social conscience. If you ever run out of ideas for service, a U.U. church will provide the impetus. My dear church in Duluth, though much smaller in numbers, also has a big heart for service and shows its maturation in community outreach.

We are a human community with lots of opportunities to serve. Earth needs us. There are those obvious ways we serve Earth; recycling, reducing our human footprint, seeking alternative power sources, etc.. All of these and more serve our planet in social action. Calling to me again today are the contributions we can make to the planet through the less obvious but always vibrant Consciousness.

We can make a difference by expressing our gratitude for the day, for a sunrise or sunset, for the delight of a rainbow. We can expand Consciousness by meditating on the Earth as the mother in labor, breathing and feeling the joy of a vibrant life, inviting conversation by commenting on the beauty we see and the abundance we enjoy. In each of these and so many others, we speak to Earth, exponentially expand Consciousness, and support Earth in our evolution.

Writing this, I now know the why and what of the globe. Thanks so much to each of you who joins with me in this blog. Knowing you are there inspires a deeper discovery, and I learn along with you as each post develops.

Thank you, Mother Earth, for your service. As we evolve out of our internal, immature life, we each know our parts better and reach out to serve you in turn.

Joined with all of you in service,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Messengers

Greetings in Gratitude!

Tears cleanse, rainbows inspire, and black squirrels always mean change in my life.

I noticed my latest black squirrel across the alley last week, running the length of the fence. I took note, of course, then two days later, as I was leaving the garage, he was sitting on the edge of our ramp, excitedly acting out and chattering. I thanked him for his messages, and now know I'm launching something.

A black squirrel ran up to the guest house I occupied the weekend in northern Wisconsin when I learned Synergy from Bill Buehler. Expanding Consciousness through Synergy meditations profoundly changed the way I operate in the world.

Jus before my mother discovered her lymphoma and I then retired from my management job downstairs, a black squirrel came to the glass door of my office and stood looking in at me.

I had never before or since seen any squirrel at that door. These are not the only "black squirrel incidents," but the most profound. Nature partners with us to deliver messages.

On October 2nd, on a clear blue, crisp evening on Lake Minnetonka, I had just completed a wedding ceremony for a lovely couple when someone in their family called out, "A rainbow! God's promise." I turned to see a small translucent cloud in that clear blue sky, filled with a rainbow, and I echoed, "Promises kept." Tears of joy sprang to the eyes of several people. Rainbows are gifts that inspire us. They are truly messengers.

My former husband, not a person to speak easily about metaphysical events, frequently saw red foxes and commented when he did. Our kids gave him a lovely print of a fox, acknowledging his "power animal." I've wondered since his death if his sightings signified events in his life.

A dream Saturday morning was of such emotional proportion that I am still revealing messages from it. It brought forward a childhood event that terrified me, a previous life as a Jewish girl on her way to a concentration camp, and all of it colliding in one little girl's fearful and tearful face, saying, "Where am I going to school?" Repeating those words, over and over as I woke, all the emotion came to the surface and I sobbed for an hour. These were important tears, and I let myself explore all the feelings. Tears cleanse, and the emotional body will persist once we give ourselves permission to cry. What was suppressed becomes awareness. We can be healed by our tears. Dreams and tears carry messages.

Wishing you the awareness of your own messengers,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Oh, That Emotional Body

Greetings in Gratitude!

Just when ya' think it's safe to go back in the water.... was the theme yesterday when the behavior of a neighbor brought me up short.

Many of us are facing our unfinished business. I've referred to this business as deep karmic threads coming to the surface for review, and it is true that we only bring them up when we have the current resources to resolve them. I am so grateful for all of you whose counsel in our sessions prepared me for yesterday.

I will simply say that a loud, explosive event next door triggered 32-year-old memories of an attack that changed my life. Today, breathing more deeply and recalling my power, I am grateful to realize what I have resolved. The threatening escalation yesterday did not trigger fear or resentments about my attacker. I could clearly see how I had resolved that pattern. What I did experience was the basic human vulnerability in the face of a threat.

Becoming all that we can be, we will review basic, human instinctual patterns/beliefs. When we think about our ancestors, we know that their survival depended upon quick reactions to potential threats. We also rally to protect or defend ourselves. It was essential to this human species as we have known it.

And what of the new human form that is in a state of becoming? New form emerges as we complete these karmic threads. And with that resolution, in the new form, we will know ourselves to be complete and inviolate. We will gradually release primitive reactions as we realize our identities in The All That Is.

So I celebrate yesterday's exercise. I appreciate the trigger/event equally with the tools I've polished to cope with it. I am respectful of the past and comfortable with the person I am becoming. My intention is to observe with increasing objectivity the person who lives next door. He is my teacher, and I am grateful. I still don't feel completely secure, but I'm getting there.

It's very helpful to remember that the emotional body cares not one whit for what we have mentally processed and (thought we) resolved. The emotional inner child will persist as long as there are any remnants of karmic patterns. That persistence is both uncomfortable for us AND reassuring. I cannot think how disappointed I would be if I had the opportunity, yet left those threads randomly floating around in my Consciousness.

In the shower this morning, I saw a bright needle with a generous eye, and this thread was poised at the eye. The message was, "You are threading your needle." Hurrah!

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Greetings in Gratitude!

Archangel David

Greetings in Gratitude!

I love, love, love the way our messengers weave into our Consciousness to deliver the Wisdom we need, and do so with such power and grace that we can laugh while digesting the import of the message.

Yesterday, preparing for a client, I closed my eyes for one of my meditation naps and was surrounded by a presence, strong and sweet with clearly defined feathers. He announced himself, "I am the angel, David, and this is about love." Then he said that the source of our emotional bodies is the angelic realm.

I was told many years ago that humanity is the first species to experience the mental, physical and emotional bodies all in one embodiment. I've met beings who operate like computers. They are beings with advanced mental and physical properties who observe us curiously because the combination of their qualities plus the emotional is unique in the Cosmic Plan.

David's message is an extraordinary thought for me and very emotional. Angels are the origin of all emotion. We possess angelic properties! Angels are not tasked with being human - ever - but now they tell us that their species endowed our species with their unique consciousness.

Their substance is at least one-third of our substance. I tremble with the Wisdom of this.

The next part of this is just as extraordinary. I looked up Archangel David on the net today, and he is the archangel of stone. He is loyal to Michael whose assignment is overseeing our planet. And stone is the source of our minerals.

In the past few months I have received increasing messages about our water sources. If we drink filtered water we are advised to supplement our diets with liquid minerals to support our immune systems. Especially, they tell me, autoimmune diseases are traced back to our drinking primarily filtered water - from city systems, our tap filters and bottled waters. Most of us do not drink the pure artesian or deep well water our forefathers did. Even those of us with wells often soften or otherwise filter the water that comes through our taps.

So now I know who has been "filtering" this information into my awareness, and preparing me for his introduction yesterday. Archangel David, thank you.

Wiser and grateful,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Becoming All We Can Be

Greetings in Gratitude!

Formlessness.

The farther we travel into this new Earth cycle, the less form there is. We are becoming a new version of human, and we can only achieve this new species by shedding the form we have known. The very nature of evolution is gradual, so, thankfully, we do not suddenly waken on a Tuesday in a form we do not recognize in the mirror. But we feel differently.

Clients relate in various ways the feeling they have that something they can't describe is unfolding in front of them. They have a sense of anticipation without form. We instinctively sense the revelation of the new self emerging.

We get busy giving form to what we do not understand. We feel disoriented without form. We feel the formlessness and instinctively seek to bring into form something that provides us a focal point, such as a symbolic date, a synchronistic number sequence, a life cycle event. We are very creative.

Because evolution simply is a state of being, what I am describing may sound like some meaningless rambling. What I know is that, since the Spring Equinox in 2009, we are evolving at an accelerated rate that does impact our consciousness. "What day is it?" And have you noticed the impression that time can be either compressed or stretched from one event to the next?

The acceleration rate is paired with disappearing perceptions that we were ever alone on the planet. Crop circles are increasing and increasingly intricate. Those in Spirit who love us are ever more visible and their messages come with greater ease. Whether through sightings in the sky or in our homes, we are becoming One with the reality of our extended dimensions.

To bring my life into focus, I greet each day by name as I watch the sun rise and express my gratitude. I breathe deeply to begin the day, and throughout the day my breath anchors me.

We integrate the new form as we breathe; all the more reason to make therapeutic breathing our first priority.

Another message is, "Water, lots of water." And check your mineral levels, especially if most of the water you drink is filtered or bottled. We must replenish our minerals if we are to feel anchored in the new form, naturally exchanging energy with the Earth.

"Oh, the places we will go," says Dr. Seuss. Indeed. Let's remember the resources available to us on this journey. We have more support than we can imagine. We do have to ask and allow if we can expect to enjoy all the help we are offered. Partnership eases the journey. I am grateful to be in partnership with all of you who link with me, here, and along all the bridges we create in person and in extended Consciousness.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Synchronicities and Curiosities

Greetings in Gratitude!

"Cherish these days." This was the sweet response to my question regarding the 10-10-10 which many people across the planet commemorated yesterday.

I love numerology. I don't live my life by it, but when numbers come up that pique my curiosity, I am fascinated at the synchronistic, mathematical features of our Cosmic structure. So I have two thoughts about the importance of dates such as 10-10-10.

First, whenever folks gather and invest in the expanding Consciousness, I breathe with them and applaud the effect on the planet. Whatever belief brings people together in an intentional, loving movement has worth.

Second, as an amateur numerologist, I wonder how any date, leaving out one number in the equation, can have energetic significance. Numerology relies on the mathematical perfection of any equation. The year is 2010, which in numerology reduces to a 3, so yesterday was 10-10-3. That means that a synchronistic date this year would have been March 3rd. Next year the "power day" would be April 4, because 2011 reduces to a 4. But just watch the focus next year on November 11. (And I love 11s, so I get it.)

I'm as fickle as anyone about numbers, of course. I loved that my son, born in '66, celebrated his 44th birthday this year, and it falls on the 22nd of his birth month. As I said, I love numbers and 11s, so I understand the fascination.

What naturally occurs to me is that, from whatever we believe, we create. If I believe a parking space will open for me in a crowded lot, it does, as it did yesterday when, after church, Mom and I drove to the most popular orchard for apples on a most perfect orchard day. So if enough people believe in the power of a certain day, the focus in Consciousness has effect on Earth; not good or bad, right or wrong, but an effect directly related to the collective belief. Christmas comes to mind. We truly have no idea when Christ was born, though it was probably in the Spring, but we focus our attention on Christmas in December and enjoy the collective benefit.

Subconscious beliefs also produce effects. We can do all of our homework, trusting that what we think will produce the outcome we desire. But if fear or conflicting belief underlies that conscious intention, then the outcome will more likely relate to the fear. And why is that important? Yes, because we want outcomes that please us, but more significantly, our fears are symptoms. And as we've discussed in an earlier posting, all symptoms are simply messengers seeking acknowledgement and resolution. This is the way we grow and become - all that we can be.

So let us "cherish these days," for the beauty in them, for our contribution to them, for the power in them that expands beyond anything we can understand. I am inspired that we cherish one another; each of us a courageous linchpin in a Cosmic invention.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, still Becoming

Consciousness as One Thing

Greetings in Gratitude!

There are days, and then there are days, and this is one of those; tired after a 32-hour trip to and from Bemidji and compelled to write no matter how I feel physically. We, Mom and I, had a great visit with family, an easy drive with some color along the way, and grateful for this extraordinary weather.

Do you ever think about, especially when life is very full, what it is that carries us along? Do we believe it is the hand of God? Do we have faith that partners in Spirit, guides and angels, lift us up when we our energy flags. Do we believe that we "get our second wind" from someplace inside of us, very self-reliant and self-sufficient? Or do we not think about it all;

just toughing it out in a gut-level reaction to life. Or do all of these beliefs inspire us, all at the same time, or in stages as we grow and become?

Reading my son's blog about church-going folks vs. atheists or agnostics, I realized I had something to say that I had never before put into words, and that inspires this:

I believe in Consciousness. I capitalize it because it is bigger than I can ever know while traveling in this human suit. And we like capitalizing things we don't understand, don't we?

I believe that Consciousness is One thing. Like a sea in which we all swim; each part knowing each other part and each playing an essential part of the Whole.

I believe that my task on the planet is to expand Consciousness. I believe that is the purpose of the human journey. One place I do that is in church, so I choose church family and structure to provide me an environment where I purposely expand Consciousness. I also believe that when we join with others the expansion has an exponential effect, and that does not require church. That can be achieved in church or meditation, discussion groups, or any place where people explore beliefs and experience communion in Mind.

Consciousness expansion occurs during my solitary meditations, conversations with all those in Spirit who fill my space, and exchanges with family, friends and clients. I could expand Consciousness sitting in a cave with no human contact, but I believe most of us are intended to form relationships, providing the means to learn ourselves, thus expanding Consciousness.

Mind and Consciousness are equally capitalized in my reference, because I believe them to be one and the same. Mind is not brain. Brain operates the body and produces logic. Mind is our collective Wisdom and includes the stored memory of the soul. This, I believe, includes all the personalities the soul has produced since the beginning of time.

Whatever our religious beliefs, if we join with others of like Mind, we probably capitalize the name of this Consciousness. We call the deity, God, Allah, El, etc.. Then we deify our Masters; Jesus, Mohamed, Buddha, etc., causing interesting theological discussions. And what of the Sacred in each of us? Can we not as easily consider each of us a sacred expression of the Source of Creation?

Watching a rerun of Law and Order last night, I heard the A.D.A. say, "Whatever gets you from here to there is OK with me." And that describes where I am. Consciousness includes all beliefs, all names, all rites, all paths. I was once told that the Twelve Tribes, created as the first generation of human beings, came from twelve different quadrants of the Cosmos and were all necessary to establish a dynamic of life that would serve that planet. Not only to serve, but all were essential to create a grid of Consciousness that would support and preserve Planet Earth.

Every religion, then, is essential to maintain the Whole. Every human being has purpose and holds a place in the Consciousness that is unique. So whether my children attend church is of no consequence to me. That we share a link in Consciousness and discuss our beliefs; that we expand consciousness even as we chat on the phone, all of that is precious to me. We are learning ourselves through one another, thus we are expanding Consciousness. Amen.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, Still Becoming

Conversations with System

Greetings in Gratitude!

New practice opportunities arise, most times when we least expect them, of course. My latest is with a virus that cropped up with symptoms Monday, in the middle of the night. And while I am a bit fuzzy this morning, I thought this would be a good time to talk about consciousness in all things - including viruses.

An organism too small to see with the naked eye has its own consciousness. Our human cells have consciousness. The space between the identifiable elements of our DNA is consciousness.

Watching a special on DNA one day, I laughed out loud when the scientist identified the various known parts, and simply dismissed the space between them as insignificant. Oh, my, science will one day catch up. In the meanwhile, we can benefit from knowing that consciousness is what holds all of our parts together - and it hears every message we send it.

I've told the story many times of the incident several years ago when I was unpacking my car in a motel parking lot in Eau Claire, WI, and slipped on ice. As I slid under the car, I heard and felt my knee pop and tear. What a mess. I was out of sight of the motel entrance, no one in sight, so I crawled to the side door, hoisted myself up and hopped to my room.

After crying for a while, I called my sister, Judith, who does absentee energy work, then I settled in to ask for help from the rest of my crew. This guidance changed the way I think about our physical system. I was guided to hold my knee, lovingly thank it for its strength and its determined service; ask it for its wisdom, then give it permission to recall its perfect function.

My first clients of the day were and are good friends who also helped me so much; going to the drug store to get a support bandage, etc. I was able to see all my clients and to do the workshop I had scheduled. I was so much better after the first day that I could stand up to take a shower - and tore the knee again! So I redoubled my efforts, since I had obviously not received the message yet.

The consciousness in every cell of my knee listened to my messages of loving respect. And I heard the messages the knee gave me; messages of resistance to going forward, fear of supporting myself entirely on this work, etc. I heard them and I breathed them in and released much emotion over the wisdom. The knee responded and repaired itself. When I left the motel in a few days, I was barely limping, and the healing continued at an amazing rate. Few things over the years have changed me so much.

So as I thought again yesterday about all of this, I realized several things. A part of me would just love to succumb to the symptoms and be sick. The kid part of me could just enjoy the chance to talk about my symptoms to anyone who would feel sorry for me and I could indulge myself in doing nothing. Or, I could speak to the virus in my system and ask why I had invited it in, then remain open to whatever means I have to release its symptoms. I've chosen the later. I've realized some of the wisdom and will continue today in a curious conversation with this visiting virus.

My next step is communicating to my System that I choose to more consciously operate so that an injury or a virus will not be necessary to get my attention. Now that is exciting!

I am grateful that I have the time to attend to these exercises in consciousness. I am also certain that we do not need "extra time," to accomplish our release from symptoms. Being gentle with ourselves, surrendering expectations and continuing the journey, we can all benefit from a conversation with our symptoms. They are simply messengers seeking to deliver important information that can bring us great benefit - if we will let them. Let's all be encouraged to explore the consciousness that is the primary element of every cell. Every cell is aware. Every cell is responsive. We are the explorers, and the terrain is within.

Until next time,

I am Phyllis, Becoming

Going SOMEwhere

Greetings in Gratitude!

Who are we, where are we going, and how do we find peace on the journey? All these questions and more underlie our daily experience as we explore change and reveal Self to self. Is it any wonder that more folks are questioning relationships, locations, jobs, inspired actions, etc.

I find myself relocating pictures/art work on my walls; changing energy in my personal space and finding a deep satisfaction in doing so. Eliminating possessions also satisfies and frees me. Just because I have room for those things does not mean that they serve my most inspired life.

I hear, "Forms collapsing." Old forms no longer serving us collapse and leave room for the expansion into a new shape that serves the inspired Self.

And this morning, I heard, "All invested for you. All you will ever need or desire." What is true for one of us is true for all.

I am trying on for size all the options of a life revealing itself in front of me. The image is of an unrevealed future; what is in front of me veiled by a billowing curtain. Each step I take revealing more as my movement is echoed in the retreating curtain.

I am floating today, levitating from space to space. Come on in. The air is fine, and then there is no air, which only means learning to breathe in a new energy. What will human become? I am so excited to be on the planet as we all learn what that means.

Until next time,

I am, Phyllis Becoming