Hello, August! And hello, too, to some of the most compelling and mysterious energy the planet has ever known. We are learning more about letting go than we ever thought possible, and we are feeling it more deeply than ever. Thankfully, we have also accumulated our tools to support us in these times of change. We express our emotions more freely and reach out for assistance with more skill. We are also creating our new lives more effectively and abundantly than ever before. We are able better to stand objectively and to appreciate the view.
I am reminded that before one trip to Duluth to speak to my church family there, I asked God what my message should be, and the answer came with resounding energy,
"Tell them how well they are doing."
Most messages from the pulpit, from the teacher, from the parent, from any authority figure are geared to teaching how to do better. Do this, do that, and surely you will get to your goal. We are tired of striving in reaction to lessons we have learned; to the the external, scrutinizing authorities. We are tired of reacting to our own inner "conscience" that presses us for more. We have been schooled for so long to persevere that we hunger for praise. I look at all the competitions we have contrived from which we can earn praise; from academic grades to sporting events, from musical competitions to Trivial Pursuit, we have learned to measure ourselves and to earn praise by excelling. Our traditional world has not taught us well how to trust the Spirit, the Wisdom inherent in us. It has not taught us how to trust our Selves.
This morning I want to tell you how well I am doing. I want to tell you because I believe that we all need to be reminded that our efforts are paying dividends; that we are all in this together; that it can feel very hard, and we need a reminder of how well we are doing. The message deserves repeating, and we deserve to hear it.
My own progress sometimes feels like that orange that's hard to peel. I love oranges, but I can't tell always when I buy them whether they will peel easily. Some oranges just resist letting go of the rind, and no matter what tool I use or how I persist, sometimes I wonder if the outcome is worth the effort. Sometimes I dig in too hard and wound the flesh. Sometimes no matter how I try the white layer between rind and flesh remains. Will the flesh and the juice inside pay in sweetness for the struggle to get there? Ah, the mystery.
Learning to live in absolute freedom is like peeling that orange. It's paying off, and I see how peeling the layers is revealing more of the fruit. This weekend I had a revelation of grand proportions. I felt myself living free of accountability. Taking shuddering breaths to adapt to the revealed Wise Self, I observed and knew that I am closer.
Because I have never been here before there is nothing to measure it by. Of course there is no need to measure, but the old self surely lived in a state of measuring progress. Breathe, again, Breathe. This state of being is apart from any "me" I have explored before. She needs to be treated gently and with great respect. She needs not to be pushed. Any birthing knows its own timing. Breathing and observing we birth and we grow.
While on any journey we would surely expire if we did not pause for breath. And even if we did not expire, we would miss the sweetness all around us. Breathing, we take a look at the terrain and appreciate from where we have come and how lovely is the view.
Nothing matters except that we are on the journey; that it is worthy of us and we are worthy of it. Oh, how well we are doing.
Until next time,
I am Phyllis, Becoming
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