While writing yesterday's post, I could not bring to mind the 3rd message I had received on waking. I let it go, and it came to me as I fell asleep last night. The message deserves its own attention, so here we go...
Stretching to come awake, greeting the day and everyone I love, I said aloud, "A day when I am answerable to no one." Then I heard myself and saw the irony in the message. I have lived my life in the belief that others have expectations of me, and that to live an honorable life, I must respond. Can't I just enjoy a day of simplicity without guilt?
My message, then, is to reveal that I have been carrying in my old and moldy system a belief that I am answerable to others, for what I do and the manner in which I choose to do it. Aaaarrrrghhhh as the cartoonist might say. This again!?
Yes, this again. I brought to this life this ancient thread of consciousness, to reveal and resolve a theme shared by many of us. We are raised in a traditional hierarchy that calls upon us to answer to those in power for what we do. Thus we grow to live our lives self-consciously. Is this acceptable, have I done anything wrong, will I earn their respect? Instinctively we look for permission or acceptance from God or from just about anyone in our personal world order.
Who's in charge here?!
We do not set out to live this way, not consciously, but our reactions speak volumes. This is not the first post in which I've explored this theme. It runs so deeply in my system that it comes up in layers, and perhaps the same is true for you. Our language reveals what our emotional and mental bodies hold for our review, only as we are ready.
When I meet with clients, so often I hear them say to me just the opposite of what I know they intend. Our conscious, intentional selves are reaching for a goal, and we're smart, so we trust ourselves to be on a productive path. Then, we open our mouths and out comes the theme in the spontaneous language we use to describe our situation. My spontaneous language revealed that this theme of living in reaction to some outside force is not resolved. It also reveals that I have intention to achieve this resolution. The symptom has revealed itself, and using breath I bring closer the Wisdom that can release the effect in my life.
This is the celebration! Yes, the belief is still active in my life. Do I choose to live this way? No. But I do not blame the symptom. Symptoms are not bad, they are powerful communicators. Realizing them we can promote ourselves. Having revealed the symptom, my Wisdom and the Symptom can get together for the Cosmic dance that releases this effect from my life.
I trust my System to inform me. Breath allows my Wisdom to reveal itself. There is Wisdom in every symptom and I embrace it. I do not try to figure out how to correct this symptom.
We can block our best intentions by triggering the logic that would pursue the remedy. Stay out of the way. Breathe and surrender to that Wisdom that is swimming to the top of your consciousness. Trust yourself. Trust that you are a Wise and buoyant being. You will float to the top; you will survive this deep plunge into the depths of your being. Float and breathe; be and become. We are all doing it together, and I am grateful.
Until next time, Breathing with you,
I am Phyllis, Becoming
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