Just when ya' think it's safe to go back in the water.... was the theme yesterday when the behavior of a neighbor brought me up short.
Many of us are facing our unfinished business. I've referred to this business as deep karmic threads coming to the surface for review, and it is true that we only bring them up when we have the current resources to resolve them. I am so grateful for all of you whose counsel in our sessions prepared me for yesterday.
I will simply say that a loud, explosive event next door triggered 32-year-old memories of an attack that changed my life. Today, breathing more deeply and recalling my power, I am grateful to realize what I have resolved. The threatening escalation yesterday did not trigger fear or resentments about my attacker. I could clearly see how I had resolved that pattern. What I did experience was the basic human vulnerability in the face of a threat.
Becoming all that we can be, we will review basic, human instinctual patterns/beliefs. When we think about our ancestors, we know that their survival depended upon quick reactions to potential threats. We also rally to protect or defend ourselves. It was essential to this human species as we have known it.
And what of the new human form that is in a state of becoming? New form emerges as we complete these karmic threads. And with that resolution, in the new form, we will know ourselves to be complete and inviolate. We will gradually release primitive reactions as we realize our identities in The All That Is.
So I celebrate yesterday's exercise. I appreciate the trigger/event equally with the tools I've polished to cope with it. I am respectful of the past and comfortable with the person I am becoming. My intention is to observe with increasing objectivity the person who lives next door. He is my teacher, and I am grateful. I still don't feel completely secure, but I'm getting there.
It's very helpful to remember that the emotional body cares not one whit for what we have mentally processed and (thought we) resolved. The emotional inner child will persist as long as there are any remnants of karmic patterns. That persistence is both uncomfortable for us AND reassuring. I cannot think how disappointed I would be if I had the opportunity, yet left those threads randomly floating around in my Consciousness.
In the shower this morning, I saw a bright needle with a generous eye, and this thread was poised at the eye. The message was, "You are threading your needle." Hurrah!
Until next time,
I am Phyllis, still Becoming
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