Grief and the Holidays

Hello again,

This is a season of celebrations, yet several people have posted on Facebook that they are facing losses and grieving deeply now.

Having had our mother pass this year affects how we feel about the holidays.  Several people I know are grieving a deep loss, facing the end of life or dealing with serious physical issues, so my feelings are close to the surface, too.

I have asked our guides and angels for help.  Here I am in the wee hours of the morning asking whether asking for help is enough or if there is something they can suggest that would help all of us.  This is their response:

"First, grieve deeply.  Do not suppress your feelings.  This may seem obvious, but any suppressed feeling must grow stronger to insure you pay attention.  Feelings are messengers and they must not remain quiet.  You may find that other conditions, such as regret or anger, lie under the layer of grief.  These feelings affect the whole of your being until they are released.

"When your holidays arrive, the contrast to suppressed emotion grows stronger.  You think you should be feeling joy, but emotions you have not yet expressed fully come to the surface instead.  They must persist until the energy of them is exhausted.

"Talk out loud to the one or the situation you are grieving.  Be loud and stay with it until you feel spent.  Practice shouting or crying loudly - or singing.  Breath is the key to feeling, and your voice is the instrument by which you exercise release.

"Think how often you have a strong feeling and push it down. We realize that you may have to delay acting out your feelings until you are in private, but the feeling is still there waiting your attention.  It is best not to ignore it.  Emotions do not go away.  You may shelve them, but suppressing them causes depression.  Yes, depression is the result of suppressed emotion.  Always.  No exceptions.

"And, yes, ask for our support.  Our presence can trigger insights and strong emotional expression when you open yourself to our help.  Asking for help is good practice in receiving and most people need that practice.  We wish you peace"

I have my homework to do.  I hope this helps you, too.

Peace,
Phyl-EL